Thursday, February 28, 2013

One day at a time.

I have been feeling very...emotional...the past few days. Actually, weeks would probably be more accurate. I am not completely sure what has been making me so incredibly moody and irritable. I have my good days, and bad days. I guess I still am grieving the loss of my Nana, which I honestly can't believe that it's been just a little over two weeks. It was honestly such a blur, I can barely remember a thing. I think about her often, and in some instances the emotions hit me more than others. I can probably say since that day of her passing, there hasn't been a day where I haven't cried. I try to be strong and put on a stoic face, but I am not ready for that yet, atleast that's what my emotions are telling me. But ofcourse, when we already have these very touchy-feely emotions, every little thing begins to bother us, or make us worry and wonder. I am absolutely not a fan of that nonsense one bit. I have been dealing with some much, that sometimes I wish I could hibernate, like the animals do. Or, spend the winter in Florida. I mean, atleast I can get a tan and play shuffle board with the retirees. Needless to say, things have been rough.
 
 
Audrey always has the right words to cheer me up and get me to think positive.
I have been in such a schlump (yes, schlump) and I really don't want to be in it anymore. I want to be able to laugh and enjoy my time with people without worry, or a constant though haunting the back of my mind. I am going to try my best to be strong - about everything. I am not going to let worry or wonder shake me, and I will think of my Nana fondly and try to remind myself that she is watching me, and she didn't like to see me cry. I will try my best to be happy, and look for the good things in all things that come my way. Because, nobody likes a frownyface. I will take each day one day at a time and not let myself get frustrated when I may not be as strong as I would like to be. And I will always remember that everything is possible. I need to start being Alice and think of six impossible things before breakfast. Well, I think of my impossible things atleast before lunch.

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