Monday, January 21, 2013

I am needy and have cravings.

Oh, hello, Monday.
Happy Monday to you lovely readers. I hope that you are having a good day, and if you aren't, I hope the Starbucks fairy visits you with some espresso. Oh, and if that's not helping, just click here. Yes, you are very, very welcome ;)
Today, I am going to talk about some things that you girls can relate to - and if not, you can just sit back and have a good laugh at my expense. So, today I am going to talk about the crazy things that I want/crave/complain about/desire when I am PMS'ing. Yup, I said it and I am going there. Let's take a journey, loved ones.
1. I want chocolate, cookies, cake...pretty much any and all things that have sugar. I don't overly crave things usually, but when I do, I want them and I don't stop thinking about them until I get it. For instance, I am craving a blended coffee from a local coffee shop, so I am making it a point today that I do there and get it. I want it all. Yes, I am Sharpay Evans, you dig? I also want tons of sugar and chocolate. If it's around and I see it, I want it. Thank God for a dad who buys you chocolate chip cookies, huh?
2. I want to lay around in my bathrobe all day. Why do I find the largest amount of comfort in this thick piece of fabric? I don't know, but all I want to do is lounge around in my bathrobe, leggings and cuddled under twelve billion layers of blankets.

3. I want to punch all of my customers in the face. When I am at work and someone asks me more than one question, I automatically want to grab a ciabbata from the bread rack behind me and beat them to death with it. No, I am not a violent person, and I am usually very patient. But, around this time of the month, I will cut you if you ask me one more time if I really did put the sheet of meat ravioli on the top of the box.
4. I want to cuddle, and cuddle and cuddle some more. I just want to cuddle. I try to cuddle with my dog, but when she gets in my bed she either lays on my pillows and I can't get comfortable or she lays of my hair or face, homie don't play that.
5. I complain about being single. I complain about being alone and single like it's my job. I will text my friend Michele and we will both just rag about our lonely times and how we wish we had a boyfriend and then we just say "whatever" and end up eating and then later say "this is why I don't have a boyfriend!" It's a rollercoaster of emotion.
6. I complain about everything. Not only do I complain about the single girl struggle, but I complain about everything. How the left side of my hair doesn't have enough curl as the other, that there is only Diet Pepsi and not Diet Coke in the house and how my jeans aren't fitting because I am bloated. The PMS complain struggle is real.
All in all, I end up being a hot mess who is shoving chocolate chip cookies in her mouth while watching re-runs of Dance Moms, texting her best friends about how fat she is going to get and how boys don't like her. I may or may not have done that last night. Pffft..not...pffft....

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